Thursday, 12 December 2013

Festive fusty

Yule regret this: Christmas beer generally
leaves me cold
Bah humbug and all that. I've had a right bugger of a day, what with a three-hour meeting I could have done without and an awkward call to a client. 

Now I've got 10 minutes to write this drivel, drink the beer, review it wittily and head out to meet a couple of mates at my pub of the year.

It's been pretty hectic and there was a point midway through the day when I was suddenly plagued by self doubt. That lasted a good couple of hours and wasn't pleasant.

But then the call was made, the clients seemed relatively happy, nobody told me off and all at once the clouds lifted. I like it when it's that easy to change the complexion of a day.

More of this ridiculous 'speed blogging' tomorrow as I've got the work Christmas bash to attend. This is why keeping the calendar going is so bloody difficult. Too much to do in December, you see. So many beers, so little time.

Tonight's is a Christmas Beer. I hate novelty stuff usually and make no exception for these annual, overly strong Yuletide offerings. It'll be like drinking liquid Soreen Malt Loaf, no doubt. With treacle on. And some ground cinnamon for good measure.

At least I'll have the best of what the Draft House has to offer to wash the doubtless overbearing taste away.

Beer: Christmas beer. Ho bloody ho.
Strength: A festive 5%
Smell: Germoline. I knew this was a bad idea.
Tasting notes: Ah, it's as bad as I expected. There's an overpowering smell competing with the dankness of rotting ginger at first, then it kicks in properly and reminds me of John Cooper-Clarke's Kung Fu International, only in a curry house crossed with a local hospital. There isn't a proverbial snowball's chance in Hell I'm going to finish it, which I suppose is good given I'm in a hurry. In its defence, it's not as malty as I was expecting and once the initial assault on the senses subsides there's a pleasing bitterness about it, like an elf or something flailing your tongue with a sprig of holly.
Session factor: Fat chance. I'm not even finishing this.
Gut reaction: I don't think it'll be as bad as I was expecting given it's much lighter than I bargained for.

Actual beer: Spruce Moose. By the man who compiled the list, I think. If it's any consolation, I feel massively guilty. In my defence, I did say I really don't like Christmas beers.

1 comment:

Eddie Short said...

Brilliant. Love the guilt trip, but every good artist needs a critic, so he should really be thanking you.